When we lose someone special, sharing their stories is the only way we can keep their memory alive. Thankfully, there are a lot of stories out there about my dad, Coach Pat Byrne.
But I need your help. I need you to share those memories here. Let’s make this a place any of us can come back to at any time when we want to relive those memories or share more stories.
One note: I know it’s natural to want to offer your condolences right now, and we do appreciate them. But this isn’t about death, it’s about life and a man who truly lived it.
Sincerely,
Nathan Byrne
Coach Pat Byrne 
I have so many memories of coach Byrne I could right a book. I will leave it very short today. I remember him taking us to eat at spot or Betty’s cafe. I remember him taking us in the old blue truck and his red jeep (which he took such good care of). Just like that jeep anytime I was there at the house (which I was millions of times) he always took good care of me. I have so many great memories of this man that was like a second dad to me at times. One thing I know is he would wrestle with Nathan, me, and other friends and he always won:) he was the undisputed champ!! Coach thanks for all the great memories, and being there. You taught me things to pass on to my daughter. RIP until we meet again!!
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I never had coach as a “coach” per say… But every time I saw him either at school or Church he gave me the longest hugs. Had great words of encouragement anytime ya needed them.
To say he was an amazing person is an understatement, he was loved by everyone who came in contact with him.
Love you coach, you will be missed!!!
“Slugger”
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I’m proud to say I got to call Pat something that no one else did, father-in-law. While I have lots of stories to share, I thought I’d start things off here with this one.
Pat wasn’t afraid to scoop Nathan up and carry him. I’ve got lots of photos to back this, but the particular time I’d like to share with you isn’t a childhood memory.
After an evening of fun at Bill’s Pub, Nathan was having a little trouble getting from the car to the house. I quickly realized that I while I was able to get him home without any trouble the task of getting him inside was going to be more challenging. One short phone call later, like my knight in shining armor, Pat was there to scoop his adult son up and carry him in the house.
I’m pretty sure that there was a smirk on his face and something along the lines of “we’ve all been there sometime” was said.
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I have manny memories of “Coach Byrne” but one stands out to me more than any. It was my junior year getting ready to start my first game as quarterback at Benton. I was walking out of the looker room getting ready to get on the bus with a huge deer in the headlights look on my face wondering if I was ready for this or not. The man that was stern and had every player on that teams fullest respect said “Horn come here” he than sat me down and let me know how proud he was of me and how hard I had worked to get to this point, and stated to me that just be focused on what you can do and do your best and everything else will play out just fine. We went on to win the jamboree that night and after the game he came up and gave me a huge hug and said “son that’s how you play football”. The one man that I and everyone on our team feared but respected gained my respect and friendship from that day on:) Thanx for everything Coach u will be missed.
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Pat always had a calm demeanor. He never got upset and always had an open ear as a freind. He knew his football and I learned alot from him. He will be greatly missed.
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I left home at a young age. When I started my junior year of high school I was on my own. The first practice of two a days, coach Byrne called me over, and spoke to me like a man. He gave respect where respect was do. The things he said I still try to live by. Thanks coach.
One more quick one. I was high jumping at our home track and Dusty Summers from Lafayette was coming on strong with his scissor kick style. I walked over to talk to my high jump coach and on my way back Coach Byrne caught my eye. I walked to him and like only he could say, told me, ” This is our house. We protect this house.” I broke a 25 year old record that day held by Scott Edwards.
Thank you coach Byrne for the teachings you passed to me, I hope to pass them to my own when the time is right.
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My memories of Pat are from first grade at Cathedral through graduation from LeBlond. I can tell you his demeanor as a child was the same as an adult – always calm, cool and collected. He could hit a softball like no other. His mother was the den mother for our cub scout troop and Pat always seemed proud of that. He was clever, witty and smart, but never put anybody down for not being as clever, witty or smart. He was strong as an ox yet gentle at the same time. After high school, I didn’t see him often, but when I did, it was like old times. I retired not long after he did, and he said everyday was Saturday. At our high school reunions, it was always a contest as to whose hair was the whitest, and he always won. He deserves all the accolades he receives, and he was an inspiration to many young people. He was a person anyone would be lucky to call a friend. I’m glad he was mine from first grade on, and I will miss him.
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I spent many an evening with Pat Byrne! He was like family to me. We played cards, told jokes, and shared many sports memories along with my husband. Mike Fitmaurice, Terry Fitzmaurice and Larry Fitzmaurice. Oh yes, and little brother John! We played many a game of Trivia and let me tell you he knew a lot of trivia! We may also have shared a few Irish whiskey bottles too! Ha Ha! Pat (Skale) wiill always be remembered fondly and with great fun! I will miss you my friend! Love you and I hope you will smile down upon us with that onery Irish smile. Till we meet again! Erin Go Braugh!
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Pat, or “Nathan’s dad” as I oddly always called him, was essentially a second dad just like Pati was my other mother. When he spoke, which was rare it seemed , I always listened. He was a man of few, but meaningful, words.
The funny story is after staying at their house practically every night during the summers of grade and high school I was convinced he had no clue what my name was. Never did he use my name. It was always Andy, Chris, Brian and you…. One time I was at their house before Nathan and I left for Mizzou junior year. Pat came in from a fishing trip and says “hey SHANE, you ready to go back to school?” I froze, I couldn’t talk. He noticed and asked what the issue was and I mentioned I thought he never knew my name…. He just busted up in a belly laugh and headed for his hot tub with some beers…. Still laughing at the thought that after 17 yrs I thought he didn’t know my name.
Tell Pati hello for us all big guy, until we meet again,
In coelo quies est.
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Coach Byrne was my high school Algebra teacher. I think it was his first year of teaching, such a quiet, handsome guy. He was very patient trying to teach me algebra. He was also one of the football coaches for EB Bulldogs. He was tough on the boys but they all seemed to respect him and did well with his coaching. Several years later, after I was married, he came to a family function and I realized that he was a member of some of the same social groups my father in law was. Got to laughing with him about his first years of teaching, trips down memory lane with him.
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A lot of memories from 2 a days in the sun and the Friday night lights. He always taught us more than football. I think my favorite and most “Coach Byrne” moment was when we were at practice on kickoff coverage and he is the returner. There’s all these 17 year old guys on the field who are sure they can contain this guy so we are all jogging and bam he’s up the sidelines laughing and saying “you going to let this old man beat you?” All the way to the end zone… Not sure why that memory stuck so much but I still laugh every time I think about it.
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I enjoyed playing softball with Pat. He made the game fun. A great competitor. He always made me feel
Special.
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Coach loved his Friday nights. He would pull in the drive & sometimes I’d still be up & bid him goodnight, other nights he would come over & join me in a drink & cigar. We would wake up my husband laughing, swapping hunting stories & most importantly, fishing stories. We would discuss parenting styles & other stories. He told me honey you just gotta live & keep doing what you’re doing with those girls 😉
I will hold on to those porch sitting memories with that man, as long as I can.
We love you Coach! You were, by far, the GREATEST neighbor & friend we could have ever asked for! Always be missed…
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I had coach my 1st two years of math at Benton. He was a great teacher who cared so much about his students and made them feel like family. Unless you was trouble as he would say! Besides in class I had the best chats with Coach at the Mustang games. I remember the first time I seen him at a game I asked if he remembered who I was and he said of course I do girl and hugged me. We would talk about family and life in general. He got to meet and spoil my kids a little 🙂 Coach you will be missed by many but will always have a spot in out hearts due to the impact you left us all.
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I have many memories of Coach Byrne. I feel like i grew up at his house throughout school. I remember the wrestling matches in his bedroom. He would take on about 3 or 4 of us and still beat us down. Mr. Byrne was more than a coach or a teacher he was a leader. He was a man who everyone liked or loved. He was great with Nathans’ friends. His friendship and my memories of him will never be replaced. Thanks for the memories Mr. Byrne you will be missed by all. Rest in Peace
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I didn’t know Pat as “coach” but as the very best friend of my brother, Jeff. Pat’s been “in the family” for years, most often we’d see him at the lake.
When I heard the news, a dozen vignettes passed through my head, but the one that stuck is of Pat frying fish and handing it out to the group, “try this batch, baby.”
Always a ready smile, fun, thoughtful and all around good guy. He’ll be missed.
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Lots of people have heard Skel and I banter back and forth. One Friday night at Johnny’s garage we were all trying to remember some old friend’s name. I happened to come up with it first and he turned to me and said “you are right”. I of course replied “I bet that hurt you to say that”. With a half second pause he said “you have no idea”. He was my brother, who I shared with one other, and my best friend,who I shared with about 10,000 others.
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Pat Byrne has been one of my best friends for 45 years and always will be. Dying won’t stop that. I don’t see my high school friends often, but they will always be special to me. I borrowed Pat’s and John’s ’55 Chevy once. As I drove it south on I-29, the “flat black” hood flew off, straight back at the windshield, and then over the top of the car. I just about died from fright. Then I had to slam on the brakes and run back and get the hood out of the middle of the highway before a big truck flattened it. Pat never blinked an eye when I told him (other than to give a big belly laugh). He probably knew it was going to happen all along. He was probably laughing to himself when he said, “Sure, take my car.” He would share anything he had but he’d play a joke on you for a good laugh too! Danielle, Pat knew how to help a friend home when the friend had too much to drink. I think he perfected his technique on me. In the last few years, every time I saw Pat he asked about my sons that are now football coaches. He always knew about their record and their upcoming season. He always said something encouraging for them and told me to be sure to pass it along to my sons. He had a huge heart!. We got into lots of mischief together – much of it dreamed up at his parent’s home that was always open to us. Of course, the place was a lot more fun when his parents weren’t home! I will miss you Skel. Thanks for everything. Sorry about the car hood!
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Always the first to volunteer. Always the cook. Always the first to pick up the mess. Always the last to leave. Johnny garage will never be the same. I was so looking forward to telling Pat stories of fishing in Alaska. Miss ya buddy! Love John Rock
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My memories of ” Pat Byrne” do not come from what he did as a coach, they came from playing against him in different sports. He had talent in all that he did, which came to life with motion, with all the talent he had at that time carried over thru his life. Our friendship grew from the playing field to being parents and neighbors. Our sons grew up together and attended the same schools. He was always their for the boys that hung out at his house, teaching life lessons that would improve their lives down the road. Rest in peace you will be missed and never forgotten.
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I’ll never forget the time I fell asleep in third period and he introduced me to 4th period as the guy that likes to sleep in class. Then refused to write me a hall pass. Best detention I ever had.
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One line from Coach Byrne I’ll never forget relating to fly balls in the outfield: “How many hands did God give you son? Let’s see you use both of them.”
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I admired your dad a great deal. I am still amazed at the way me treated me every time I saw him, going all the way back to when I was a child. He was as gracious a gentleman as I’ve ever met a true Southside legend.
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RIP Coach Byrne. You were an awesome coach and person. You were one of very few people to scream in my face and pick me up by my face mask and get away with it. What a fiery competitor!
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Pat was an incredible man that I have always held dear to my heart!! He was more than just a great friend and coach to me! He was a true father figure that taught me as much about life and being a real man as any other person I’ve been blessed to know! He will be greatly missed, but always loved and remembered as one of the most amazing men I have ever known!!! God Bless…
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I wanted to share a couple of great memories of Pat with everyone. When I was a soph and he a freshman. Intermural football playing against him. I took a punt and broke free with only him to beat. He never touched me but chased me all the way to endzone. Came up and said he never knew I was that fast. Told him I didn’t know either. But when I saw the look in his eyes I was running out of fear. He laughed and said he had heard that before. Gave me a gentle punch and said. On the field fear him but off he was a teddy bear. The second one was right after I came back from Vietnam. A friend had asked if I would play on their softball team. When I showed up I looked across field and saw Pat. He saw me and came running over to me. I thought he was going to remind me to fear him again. But instead he grabbed my hand and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. Said he was glad to see me and that I had come home safe. Said he wanted to thank me for my service. He then walked over to booth took the mic and told everyone I had just got back from nam. Told them my name and said I was a friend of his. Made me feel very proud that day. For this I had always a great admiration and respect for this man. God bless you Pat it was my honor saying you were my friend.
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I will never forget the time I went to my first freshman football practice. Going through a drill, was the first time I’d met or seen Coach Byrne. I was frightened by his stare. We stood face to face, and he didn’t say a word. He said, “get in your stance”. He then put his hand on my left shoulder and without any effort he nearly pushed me over with one hand. He said, “spread your feet out more….you need to wider your stance.” He pushed me again, and I didn’t stumble. Ever since then, I’ve stood up to any adversity in life. And if I stumble, I know that I can get back up with no shame. I am proud to be a Benton Cardinal. I wasn’t horrible at football and baseball—-But Pat Byrne was so much more than a football/baseball coach. He was a life coach!!! He is now surrounded in heaven by all the BHS legends, smiling down at us!!! Springer, Tabor, Capps, my great grandfather and so many more before us.
Mike Daffron
Proud Cardinal, Class of ’91
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I played a lot of softball with Pat and the one thing that I will never forget is that no matter what the score was he never gave up. Rest In Peace brother, You will be missed!
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Hey, Skel,
I’m sitting here in front of my computer, typing with my stubby, oft-broken fingers, and to the right on my desk is a 5X7 framed photo. It’s a photo that brings back so many memories, including some that preceded the photo by decades. Fact is, you and I have been friends for over 40 years. And after we got beyond playing for different teams, we became great friends…and great teammates…as well. I think of those teammates often: Danny and Moby; Gary, Jimmer, Dud and Jeff, Steamer and Hose Nose, “Whiff” (that would be Gus), Rag, Murray, Andy, Davey and so many more. The only thing we did more than win was have fun. However, we can’t talk about much of that (unless amongst ourselves), because “what went on in St. Joe stays in St. Joe”. And not just there, but also Atchison, Topeka, Kansas City, Springfield, Columbia, Jeff City and all the other places where we won a lot and got out of town fast. That was the ’70s. In the ’80s and this past decade, we stayed close (despite the distance) via phone and computer and especially the round tables at the Brown Bear. Where we met again this past April. That was great fun. Although none of us at the table had a clue about what Gary Harris was saying most of the time.
And then there were the ’90s. That decade when you and Dumb Dan came up every year for an Iowa Hawkeye football game. You drove all night after coaching your own teams. We started tailgating early; though actually you’d started much earlier. Probably when you crossed the Missouri-Iowa line. We saw great football games. And grilled great grub on our deck after. Plus told lots of lies. The on Sunday mornings you and Danny were usually up early breaking down tape of your next week’s opponents. And later we usually caught the first NFL game before you headed back to St. Joe on what had to be a REALLY long five hour drive.
One year we changed that Sunday schedule, though. Near noon we headed north and east to the “Field of Dreams”. I’d been there many times, though never with best friends. We originally planned on staying for an hour. After three hours of hitting, fielding, throwing and running (often racing six-year olds) around the bases, we reluctantly decided to leave. But before that, we asked one of the dads to take a photo. That’s the photo is on my desk, where it will stay. From right to left, it’s Danny, you and me emerging from the left field stand of corn. The corn had turned brown, but was still taller than any of us. Fact is, I’ll never again need to have that photo in front of me to see it. And because of that photo, I can see other things, too.
I can see the three of us leaving the corn and heading toward the parking lot. But as we reach the infield, Danny and I both notice that you’re no longer with us. We turn and see you striding purposefully back toward the corn. We both call out, but you don’t respond. Until you reach the corn. Then you turn back toward us. Our eyes meet, and linger. You smile…you nod…and you wave one more time. Then you turn and walk into the corn. We know that you’re on your way to a better place. That place where Pati and those other dear ones have been waiting for you.
By the way, Pat, when I join you…which probably won’t be all that long…I’ll make sure to bring my bat and a ball. And when Danny comes along sometime later, he can bring his glove. Maybe by that time he’ll have learned how to use it! Or not.
God bless you, my friend,
Buzz
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If you can send me a copy of that pic I would LOVE it. My name is Tom, I’m Pat’s older brother (same birthday 12/12) five yrs. different. I’ld LOVE to frame that pic!!!! E-mail is tomcatkd@yahoo.com. Thanks if you can.
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March of 2012, my dad Ronnie O’Rourke was not well health wise. We had dad to Johnny’s garage. He wanted him to come and sit and drink a beer with him. Of course John and Pat Bryne were there. Before we left Pat invited dad and us to his house for an Irish breakfast. We went and had a good time. As always telling stories and including dad. As we thanked Pat for having us, he said no thank you. I’ve always loved your dad! And of course a big hug! Dad died a few months later. So Pat thank you again for what you did for dad that day! I’m sure the Irish are smiling in Heaven! Love, Mark and Kathy O’Rourke Olvera
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We didn’t know Pat as a coach (unless you count his super supportive and positive help with our respective golf games!) We knew him as a friend briefly, and are sad we weren’t blessed to have known him longer and better. He was always so kind and warm, a gentleman with a rare grace and quick wit who always made us feel welcome and a part of whatever was going on. He was one of those rare people that always made you feel good about yourself and left you in a better mood than when he found you. Our lake community will not be the same without him.
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Coach , was a guy I love to play football for. I always look up to you for advice. My last game my sr year he told me I was all heart. No matter what I told you to do. You would try! You will be missed!!
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God’s blessings on you Pat. My memories of you are full of laughter in high school. I know you are now with Pati and so happy… I remember how fiercely you loved her and how proud you were of your wife and family. You made a difference Pat to so many….so solid and true.
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Pat was the “Best Man” at our wedding in 1973. He would stop by our shop every Christmas season ( usually with Brother John and beer) Pat brought jerky the past couple of years and John makes his special chex mix (Mom B’s recipe). Every card he has sent to us over the past 41 years was signed “still the Best Man”. We will all raise our glass to that. You were, are and always will be “the Best Man”. Rest in peace, you will be terribly missed by many.
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I had Coach for math twice at BHS. My Jr year it was algebra basically in a class full of freshman. Numbers are not my strong suite to say the least. After a few months I was lost and decided sleeping was the option. Coach decided standing was a better one. At semester needless to say I dropped the class. When i had him sign the slip i asked him why I had to stand when i was not the only one napping. I won’t say his exact words but basically he told me if he had as much faith in the rest as he did me i wouldn’t have been standing alone. Those words stayed with me always. Now and then when i need a little boost i think about that. But, I have still managed to get through about everyday and not need algebra. Rest in peace Coach Byrne.
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Coach Byrnes was my favorite High School Math Teacher. He made us feel like we wanted to learn. He inspired me to go to college. And he showed respect to the students. Their was never a question not answered . If any thing he inspired us to learn and to always move forward. He will be greatly missed . Sincerely Elizabeth Wallace EBHS
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A few recent memories. Seeing him after 40 years and knowing him right away. Offering my friendship and care and having him accept it hesitantly. Taking Pat to NY for the first time to meet my son and showing him it’s not so scary. Times Square and the naked cowboy, but of course he found the naked COWGIRL and had to have a picture to show the guys at Johnny’s garage. Not to be seen at this time. Me taking him to his first 3-D movie and the selfie after. (I know). His sticker shock at East Coast prices. How he let me call the GIANT recliner in his house “the Cadillac”. His willingness to go to Longwood Gardens for our first real excursion and how much he enjoyed it. Pat, Johnny and Debbie and I on their first Broadway show trip and the most impressive thing was how I managed to get them all on the train back to NJ in the midst of a human traffic jam. Being able to take him to an Elders concert in Pennsylvania. Him insisting that after we parked the car he knew the way back to the concert ground and after an hour and a half walk in the completely wrong direction (!) I finally said, let me try and I got us there is a few minutes. Him into talking to the Bryne guy in The Elders and introducing the guy as his cousin, then proceeding to the tent and singing every song at the top of his lungs in a very small enclosure and standing up and being out of sorts that more people weren’t doing the same. His complete pride and love and devotion to Nathan and his family, especially the grandsons, and his incredible pride at how well Nathan has done. His grief over losing his baby girl. His agony at the end of Pati’s life and wish that he could have done more. His disbelief in his own handsomeness. His insistence on referring to himself as a “Knucklehead” at which point I started calling him “Knuck”. and he started calling me “Miss Fancy Pants Know It All”. His agony over his perceived errors and mistakes throughout his life. His eagerness to learn. But his insistence on watching ONLY old tv shows like Gunsmoke or Rifleman. His simplicity. His total acceptance of me with all my flaws. His comfort In the midst of my mothers infliction. His unerring, unfailing faith in God and his religion. His wide ranging group of friends. His insistence that in his lifetime there would be no out gay players in the NFL and his acceptance once Michael Sam came out. His message to me on email a few days before he died asking what he can do because my brother was in a terrible accident. If he was alive he would be asking all of us, what can I do to ease your pain?
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Not only did I have Coach ‘Cat’ Byrne as a football and baseball coach I had him as an Algebra teacher….when I seen coach for the first time it was on the practice field….I was late for freshman football practice my first day. …As I jogged down to the end of the field where the other freshman were I had to pass the Varsity guys where there stood the most intimidating man I had probably ever seen….coach Byrne….He gave me that look….those of you that played for the Cat know that look…lol..His eyes were on me the whole way. Right then and there I knew it was a whole new deal I had gotten myself into. In his class room was no different. …coach made students accountable just by a look….He was a soft spoken man and demanded respect….just by a look….As I grew older and made my way up to Varsity in both sports I had gained his respect just by being accountable…that’s all he wanted in my eyes…I sure as hell wasn’t going to let him down….now don’t get me wrong …I still got those looks from time to time but I survived….Coach Byrne treated me with respect…like a ‘man’ and at that age that meant the world! I could go on and on about stories from games not to mention practices. ..I along with others were around coach almost every day from late summer to late fall and from spring to summer for 3 plus years….I never knew anyone who did not respect coach Byrne! I am proud to let people know I had the privilege to be associated with coach Byrne and call him my friend…..
Coach. ….you will be missed but NEVER forgotten!
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I met Skell on a Patrol Boy trip to see the Royals. We were in 7 th grade. We became instant friends. We still are. I have hundreds of stories. Those will come over Beers and Food some day when I come home. This is how Pat Byrne became Skell. We were playing intramural basketball in High School CBHS. We went to shirts and skins. There class ( the Smart Class) went Skins. Pat took off his shirt and immediately you could see his Ribs! I yelled ” Skeleton Man” and from that day on he was Skell ! That boy could eat! So these stories about him cooking that took some trust. LOL! Skeller I have shedd a few tears. But they were happy ones. We had some Great Times. ” Those Were The Days My Friends We Thought They Never End.” Love you Brother! “Go IRISH!” In Jesus Hands!
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To us at Lake Viking Pat was not known as Skel or Coach (although we heard those names a lot when he had his home boys with him). To us he was Patrick T. Where the T comes from I don’t know, you would have to ask “Sammy” that question! When we were together we fished, listened to music, played trivia around the campfire, solved many of the worlds problems, perfected Pat’s creation of “Jungle Golf” and sometimes drank a beer 🙂 These are some of the best memories of my adult life outside of my family, and many times both my wife and kids were with us. They too, loved Pat dearly. He always had a peaceful and calming effect on my spirit and I always looked forward to spending my time away from work with “Patrick T”, the Man, the Myth, the Legend! I love you my friend and I will think of you often. May you rest in peace until we meet again!
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The T in his name was his confirmation name Patrick Michael Timothy Byrne!!! I’m his older brother Tom (we had the same B-Day 12/12 mine 47)
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Pat was a great brother in law and friend too.I know he would do anything for family and friends. I loved spending the holidays with him.
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I will always remember the times with “Patrick T” at Smitty and Connie’s house. We always had a great time around the fires out in Smitty’s yard. Now those two can enjoy each other’s company where we all will meet later. I also had the great opportunity to play softball on a team with Skel. He was a great athelete no matter what he played
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My memories of Pat come from way, way back, childhood and growing up on 13th Street and playing many many ball games down at College Hill, day or night, weekday or weekends!!!! All of us kids that lived on 13th lived, laughed, and had such fun. Pat, John, and their brother Tom all played ball like all is us did ; all out and to the best of our abilities. Between the Byrne brothers , the Marshall boys and a few of us other kids we had a great team and great times!!! Life was fun and simple back then !!! I left 13th Street many years ago and St. Joe shortly after that BUT I never visit Joe town and don’t run up by the old street and smile !!! It appears that Pat had a great life and lived it “all out”……. RIP my friend and secret crush when I was 13.
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Thanks Deb!!!! This is Tom and Ditto!!!
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My best memories is of a tournament we played in Springfield and we went out in two games. Danny and Skel were propping up a wall when Skel decided to cross his legs . He lost his balance and went skidding into a concrete pillar. He came back and resumed his position against the wall and crossed his arms and legs as if nothing happened. Danny looked at him and said where did you go ? I ask that same question now. Where did you go my friend.?
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Two years have passed now buddy. The garage is not the same, Viking is not the same, hell the County Clerk’s office is not the same. You are in every conversation at all of the above mentioned sights. Rest in the Peace that you earned. All of our love Iron, Judy, Jacy and Kellen.
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